Look for the hidden treasure in these 3 phases of lockdown living
I know, lockdown life SUCKS! We can’t travel, we can’t go eat out, we can’t see our friends all together, the shops are closed..even ikea is shut down and doesn’t even accept online orders anymore after the sheer amount of people trying to make orders at the same time..!
Crazy, right. I know. This is all from the consumer side of things. If you are on the business side of things, lockdown life could also suck for you too right now, with your job endangered, or your business stalled completely and your income slashed. I know this too.
Lockdown life can be hard for sure, for different reasons, for different circumstances. For some more than others, and in different ways. We’re all impacted as this is a collective shift we’re on.
Wherever you are in the spectrum of disturbance caused by the lockdown, from a place of real suffering right now, to one of lack of meaning, or another of trying to ride the huge opportunity that lays ahead of you as a result of this crisis…there is a hidden treasure to be found here for all of us.
Phase 1 · suffering
If you catch yourself complaining a lot about the situation, and going on about all the things you can’t do right now, you’re probably in the suffering phase. A place where a lot of us have learned to dwell in at some point in our young lives, usually by caregivers (parents mainly) who modelled this behaviour to us and we just picked it up as the truth.
There is little that can come out of complaining and dwelling here. Don’t you think? But the thing is, because it is a learned behaviour, it actually makes us feel good a tiny bit. It’s a way to blow out some steam and keep going as we have found ourselves something to do.
In reality, we do this so that we avoid to actually be present with our experience in the moment. Which means to actually feel what it is coming up for us in the form of emotions that we perhaps have buried deep inside and haven’t allowed to emerge in a long time.
Now I’m not saying that a little bit of a rant here and there is a bad thing. It’s not, it’s ok to get angry and talk about the situation with a friend, or your mum on the phone. (I find that mums love this anyway). The problem is when this becomes our habitual way of behaving. When we only see the negative and dwell in that place as opposed to growing from the situation we’re in.
Now you may be suffering and not complaining about what’s happening. The restriction and isolation of the lockdown life can bring up very difficult emotions which most of us were never taught how to cope with. And so we end up suppressing them because we don’t know what else to do.
Chronically suppressed emotions are more like a inner tornado that is waiting to be released.
This can feel very scary, so a lot of us just ignore the signs, and choose to carry on numbing the sensations we feel through addiction, ephemeral pleasures, and seeing life as something that is happening to us and we have no control over. The lockdown is triggering more emotional turmoil, with less opportunities to evade it, as we cannot turn to the same pleasures that usually made us feel better before.
If you are here, ask yourself this - am I ready to look at the underlying issues that cause me to feel like this right now?
What is taking me forward in my life right now - repeating how hard it is, or actually doing something about it?
Whether you are avoiding the discomfort you feel with complaining, or numbing in another way, the only way out is in, and allowing for your emotions to slowly be felt and released.
A great resource for this phase is this book - which I read myself when I was here back in March and helped me a lot.
More to come on this phase on next week’s blog with tips and guidance how to cope with emotions.
Phase 2 · depression and lack of purpose
I know a lot of people who are challenged with feelings of meaninglessness and depression right now. If you are in a place of relative comfort in your circumstances (you still have your job, or your business is going alright, not too threatened) and the main thing you have to deal with is the lack of social activity, having to work from home, and the lack of something to look forward to, depression can creep in easily in the absence of a clearly defined goal or vision to carry you right now.
The lockdown could be highlighting things that maybe you haven’t had the chance to consider before. Sometimes when life is comfortable, and we are used to the every day activity and little pleasures of life, like going to work, having a routine, feeling ok with your favourite food, your favourite pass time things, like movies, and travels, and all the things that you like doing…it’s easy to lose touch with…the bigger picture.
Where is your life going? Why do you do what you do? Why do you live where you live, why do you spend your time they way you do, what is your life’s vision and are you on the right direction according to what you want to experience, live, enjoy, create, pass on in your lifetime?
Lockdown is shedding light to these questions, if you are in this phase right now. As hard it can be to suddenly live from a very different place of restriction, one thing is for sure, the hidden treasure is to go where the bigger picture of your life has somewhat become forgotten.
If you feel depressed, or you lack meaning, you have nothing to be excited about or maybe you know there is more but you can’t pinpoint what exactly, start envisioning your future. This is your chance to renew your energy, pivot course of direction and start getting excited about what you want to create in your life! I’m excited for you, go ahead and do it!
Phase 3 · overwhelm due to massive opportunity
Or, you may be in a place where you can clearly see that this time is FULL of opportunity that lays ahead of you. Many people have benefited massively from the lockdown as we know, with cashflow changing direction and going towards businesses that are online mainly amongst other industries. Maybe you work online already, or you have the means to start working online, now is the time to go all in.
I also understand how overwhelming it can be to feel this pressure right now. How do you get yourself together to ride this massive wave of opportunity right now to grow your business, or start something new that has a tremendous potential?
A lot of things come up when we are on the verge of serious expansion. When we are on the path to creating something that has a big potential this is exactly what is happening, we are called to expand on all levels. Creating value that brings in wealth is about how you show up in the world, and how you show up has to do with your ability to ride your own wave of insecurities, self-doubt, limiting thoughts, self-inhibiting beliefs and suppressed emotions that are keeping you stuck. In the process of expansion, all these things come up, and they can haunt us. How we go forward, how we choose to deal with them, defines our progress.
Here’s where we realise that the only way to go forward is by taming our inner demons. Some of us do this unconsciously, by being able to focus so well on the task at hand that the process becomes natural and almost unnoticed. The rest of us have to work on it somehow, we need to figure out what keeps us stuck and consciously work through our own barriers to success.
The hidden treasure here is not so hidden, right? Learning to ride this wave and keep going towards your chosen direction will make you a more resilient, focused, conscious and self-aware human being. This is a great example of ‘it’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey’. The destination is also great here, so just go for it, ride and flow, what an incredible time to experience life right now.
Whichever phase you’re in, look for the hidden treasure. And keep going.
No one ever failed because they weren’t good enough, people fail the moment they give up on their dreams, wants and true desires.
This month I will talk about how to thrive on lockdown and these three phases here on the blog, so subscribe to my newsletter to stay informed. New post comes out every Tuesday.
Follow along on instagram and facebook.
Join my private women’s FB group where I’ll be going live weekly starting this Wednesday at 8pm CET. This week I will talk about thriving on lockdown and guide a practice to tune into yourself, release some stagnancy and make space for clarity into your next steps.
If you need support and discuss a coaching journey together, you can always reach out to me here.